waiting waiting waiting

Nineteen months. I keep saying eighteen months, as that sounds like a reasonable time. But really, the wedding (now we've set a date in all but sending the deposit) is very nearly nineteen months away.

I've got a venue sorted. I think I've got someone to marry us (let's leave humanist ceremonies for another post) I've got a photographer sorted. I want to get everything sorted. But I don't want to do it too soon.

I had a dinner with my girlfriends and showed them the venue photos and they are all very excited. But it's such a long way away. I am desperate to do things now.But at the same time, desperate to wait until a point at which people will stop saying: "Well you've got ages. It's a long way away."

I got pretty down the other day, leading me to berate a confused bf during what must have, for him, felt like the longest trip up the M1 in the history of the world. The engagement was so exciting. Telling our friends was so exciting and being 'engaged' was so exciting. But now it's back to normal. I can't plan too much. I can't do too much (other than get stressed over the slow pace of wedding weight loss).

Was there ever such waiting, such waiting before?

(** one of my favourite poems when a small person)