Workmates. I like mine. But I don't really see them outside work. They're not friends, or not yet - they're colleagues. Good colleagues, but still colleagues.
I work in a small office and there are eight of us. One works part time and won't be invited, but will be fine with that. But the others - I'm still left with six colleagues. One's the boss, and we know her partner so he'll need to be invited. One other has a partner I know. Three others have partners but I don't know them and if we get the invitations out soon we can get away with just those two plus ones. So that's eight invitations. Out of 85 guests. That is, let's say, a large proportion. A huge proportion, in fact.
However - they are all very excited for me and I think I should invite them. Discussions with my best ladies this evening began with, "don't invite them if you're not sure, save the money" to, 'it'll be more trouble than it's worth if you don't invite them," and, "at least they are a discrete group and can look after themselves." There it is: the wisdom of crowds. I should invite them.
But as with this wedding, if you come, you're there for the lot: ceremony and evening event. However - something about saying the vows in front of my colleagues makes me feel uncomfortable. These aren't people that know us intimately, and barely know J at all. Two have just worked there for two months so far.
As I type this, the solution is starting to seem obvious - invite them to arrive after the ceremony. But everyone else would be arriving before - with just colleagues there later. Am I being daft? Does it matter if they are there for the ceremony or not? I'd even need to print them special invitations.
In an ideal world, I'd invite them and half would politely decline. But isn't it wrong to invite people who you secretly hope won't turn up?